Hi, I'm Petra and this is my weight loss/fitness blog.
I used to be on Weight Watchers from January 2011 to October 2012, dropping approximately 45 lbs. I've made the transition from unhealthy and unhappy to athlete and this is my journey to becoming a healthier, happier me. I frequently post about my exercise (mostly running, yoga and lifting), the foods I eat, recipes I liked and my daily struggles. You'll also find the occasional tree hugger post, (travel) photography or anything else I find worth remembering and collecting.
I follow most blogs back that follow me. However, I do stay away from blogs that promote EDs, unhealthy methods of weight loss or negative body image.
Feel free to say hi any time!
After yesterday’s 9-miler having been so awful, today was a repeat performance of equal awfulness. I had planned for 12 miles and I barely made it, but I did. I’m not going to bother with too many stats, instead I’ll try and understand why I’ve been struggling so much on my runs lately.
I was actually quite excited when I headed out the door. Today was the NYRR NYC Half, so I thought Central Park was going to be crowded and I’d better run a different route. I decided to run along the Hudson River, down to the Battery. It’s my old course from before moving neighborhoods and I was excited to go back. Especially since the weather was going to be nice. The course is mostly flat and I thought it would be great for my confidence.
I started my run and for one reason or another, I just couldn’t get into it. It didn’t take me very long to realize that it was going to be another long struggle and I hated it. The only thought on my mind was how I felt miserable and how I wanted to stop. I did run the first 6 miles without stopping, then I refueled, turned around to head back home. I guess if I hadn’t been all the way at the far end of Manhattan, I might’ve called it quits and just cut my run short. But I was quite a few miles away from home and the only way to get there was to suck it up and start running again. The next 6 miles were miserable and I had to slow down to a walk twice.
I don’t know why this keeps happening. It should have been 12 “easy” miles. I’ve done 13 miles without stopping at all before. I don’t know why everything longer than 8 is giving me such grief these days. I’m sure that some of it is mental. Some of it must be just in my mind. But some of it also felt physical. I’m blaming the fact that I’ve worked too much and slept too little lately. At one point, I felt so slow as if I were moving backward instead of forward. I started hurting all over and I don’t like it. Running is supposed to be fun, not something I suffer through.
My half is in less than a month and I’m quite frankly terrified. I feel in absolutely no shape to run a half marathon, let alone one that is a tough course. Quite honestly, I don’t know what to do. Suffer through and just hold on? Reduce miles and feel even less ready (especially, when the training plan that I’m following only half-heartedly tells me that I need to increase weekly mileage)? I don’t know.
To make myself feel better, I headed to Anthropologie and Uniqlo and bought myself some new clothes. So much for saving money.